It’s one of the biggest honors to be considered a bridesmaid in your girl’s wedding, right?! But did you know that there are jobs and responsibilities that come with that title? It’s totally more than just getting a dress, some new shoes, and hanging out all day with the bride tribe. Today, let’s talk about the art of being a bridesmaid!

Will you accept this rose?

So you’ve been asked to stand as a bridesmaid, you’ve said yes, and…now what? This is where being supportive friend comes in. Your duties don’t start and end on the day of the wedding, they come long before! You now have this special responsibility to be a 2nd opinion to the bride on any decisions she may need help with. HOWEVER, this does not mean you get a free pass to undermine what the bride wants. It is HER day and should go how SHE wants.

The wedding planning process is so stressful, and you are there to help your girl through it. Be a kind, gentle voice when needed, and always remember sometimes it’s better to listen than to speak. A listening ear can do wonders for a stressed soul.

 

Head of the Party Planning Committee

Now when I got married (NINE years ago 🤯), I didn’t have a bridal shower, wedding shower, bachelorette party, or anything of the sort. It wasn’t something I thought about in the wedding process, and I didn’t have a bridal party to help me through everything. I’m going to jump out here and say one of your first duties as a bridesmaid is to consider when to throw your girl her showers.

Feeling loved is really important, especially if you’re super stressed about this whole process. These showers are to help DE-stress the bride and to know she has a support system behind her. Plan it to a T and make sure you don’t put too much pressure on the bride. Make sure the foods are things she would like, the decorations are tasteful, and it’s not a party the bride would want to run away from. You would be surprised at how many horror stories I’ve heard from brides about parties thrown for them. Make sure your themes fit your brides!

 

Dress Duties

This is one thing I hear brides and bridesmaids alike complain about. I’m going to just say it. This part is not up to you. I don’t care what you think looks good on you, you DO NOT get to pick your dress unless the bride specifically says you can. This is her day, her dream, and you will look how she wants you to look, whether you think it’s a good color for you or not. Also, if the bride asks you to purchase your dress, just do it. I know that it can be inconvenient, but this is literally a way you can publicly show the investment you have in your friendship. When I got married, there was absolutely no way I could have paid for bridesmaid dresses. Ease that burden on the bride and be willing to pay the price if necessary.

As for the bride’s dress, if she absolutely loves a dress (even if you do not), let her have the dress. Again, it is not your wedding, it’s the bride’s. I mean, if she’s wanting like green lace on top of neon yellow, MAYYYYBE try to steer her away from that, but otherwise, let her have her moment and fall in love with a dress on her own. Support her thoughts, give her encouragement, and help her to decide which one she feels most beautiful in.

 

The Big Day

Okay, so now it’s time for the big day! We’ve planned all the things, picked all the dresses, and found all the perfect accessories. This is by far going to be the best (and most stressful) day of your BFF’s life. Help her through it in anyway possible!

I’d start by helping the bride with a checklist before the wedding, so this is probably something you’d need to do the night before. Choose all the important things that need to go to the venue the following day. FOLLOW THROUGH. Make sure everything gets in the car, and heaven forbid, if something is forgotten, make sure it gets there whether you go get it or call someone else.

Getting Ready

Obviously it’s important you get ready, but most importantly, the bride needs to get ready. Ask her if she needs anything, give her anything she asks for, help keep track of her things. Pamper her! If something serious enough comes up that she feels she needs to go attend to it, offer to do it for her. Help make sure everything is running smoothly so she can experience her day to its fullest, worry free!

This is totally not to say you can’t have fun, just make sure you’re helpful above all else. There are more than enough opportunities to chill and hang with everyone throughout the day, but there are also moments that you will need to take action. You want to stand behind her on this big day and someday, if she hasn’t already, she will do the same for you on yours.

 

The Group Photos

Honestly, I am just going to say do what you’re told here 😂 I haven’t run into too much trouble in this area, but there was one time a bridesmaid literally told me no. She would not do a pose because she thought it was dumb. Don’t be that girl. It’s not about you.

 

Ceremony and Reception

During the ceremony, it’s way simple. Stand, smile, fluff her dress, and feel the love. Be genuinely happy for your friend! This is the best gift you can give your girl on her day. She’s marrying her love, and that’s so wonderful.

And finally, it’s time for the reception. This is where the fun part comes in! Your job is simple, pull people onto the dance floor and make sure everyone is having the best time! Dance with the bride, laugh with the groom, and take some cute Photo Booth poses with your friends. Make memories to last a lifetime and CELEBRATE because that’s what weddings are all about!

 

Being a bridesmaid is a labor of love. It’s a lot of  work, fun moments, and love all wrapped into one. Be the best friend you could possibly be just by being there for your bride. She will appreciate you more than you know.

And with that, I’m out for the day. See you soon, friends!

-Lauren B.